An analysis of why I suck at them
Every couple of years, I'm faced with the same cycle. I date a guy, we're happy, we spend 1-2 years together in blissful coupledom, and then he or I move away because of school, jobs, or whatever. There are a couple weekend trips to see one another and a lot of long phone conversations. Then, inevitably, we break up. The cycle begins again anywhere from 2-4 months later.
Now, the elephant in the room that I've been unsuccessfully ignoring is - why will this time be any different? Reason 1. I'm moving within driving distance, not flying distance. Reason 2. I'm older and quite possibly wiser about relationships. Reason 3. 75% of the vet school is female and I'm sure a good number of the other 25% are taken. Reason 4. I'll be really busy with school and won't have time to really think about a relationship. Reason 4. Aside from slight twinges of jealousy that I chalk up to being human, I trust him.
However, I'm still a little hesitant to commit myself to this long distance relationship. Reason 1. He's Catholic, I'm not. Which isn't really a problem unless this is serious and we have kids. Reason 2. He's very social and sees nothing wrong with a lunch date with a pretty girl he just met through a sports league. (I put my foot down after that one... I have found that once you start getting to know someone you could be attracted to on a one-on-one basis, problems start. This is how I resist temptation and keep myself honest.) Reason 3. He's not so keen on moving to where I'll be stuck during the next 4 years, and I just can't see a relationship making it for 4 years separated.
I guess I'll wait and see how things go, but I hate to waste my time and energy... or his. I have a feeling his priorities (college football games and tailgating) won't leave much free time for me, and my time will already be stretched thin. It frustrates me to not know how the future will pan out, I'm too much of a planner to leave my life to chance.
The funny thing is, I have no problem meeting guys and I bet I could find someone who isn't very religious, likes animals more, and understands my life isn't very flexible so he'll have to make more concessions for the time being. But I don't go looking because I spend a lot of my free time with my guy. I am happy in my current relationship and the chemistry is great... but is the grass always greener? Is this why I am falling prey to "out of sight, out of mind" and giving up on my long distance relationships? Or do I just miss having someone around to fill my free time? Hmm. I suppose I'll find out if I'm a serial breaker-upper when it comes to long distance, or if I've finally grown up and found someone I could be happy with.